35 Gag Gifts for the Scrooge in Your Life

By   

View as:

Grumpy old man wearing a Santa hat
Photo credit: SteveLuker/istockphoto

PRESENTS FOR CURMUDGEONS

We all have at least one person in our lives that acts like grumpy old Scrooge from "A Christmas Carol" when the holidays roll around, but that doesn't mean you can't still treat them to a laugh. Whether it's an emergency clown nose for a curmudgeonly boss or cranky co-worker, or a bearded ski mask for that family member who needs some relief from holiday stress, we've found hilarious gag gifts for every type of person on your list. From silly novelties to surprisingly useful products, these gag gifts are sure to brighten up the holidays for everyone. (Note: Prices and availability are subject to change.)

Profanity Book Generator
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

PROFANITY GENERATOR BOOK

Price: $9.44 | Buy it on Amazon
The Scrooge in your world likely has plenty of negative things to say around the holidays, so why not help them get a bit more inventive than just "Bah! Humbug!" This profanity generator notebook lets them mix and match curses when standard profanity just won't do, and the resulting expressions are hilarious.

Toilet Mug
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

TOILET MUG

Price: $13 | Buy it on Amazon
For the Scrooge with a potty mouth, this toilet-shaped ceramic coffee mug makes for a hilarious gag gift. Not only is it practical for keeping them well-caffeinated -- and therefore less grumpy -- they can also impress friends and co-workers with their very own throne.

Digital Retirement Countdown Timer
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

DIGITAL RETIREMENT COUNTDOWN TIMER

Price: $17 | Buy it on Amazon
As much as Scrooge would prefer that everyone work on Christmas, he also likely looks forward to retirement when he doesn't have to be bothered by everyone's holiday cheer. Give your favorite Scrooge something to look forward to with this clock that counts down the time to their retirement.

Scrooged Movie
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

'SCROOGED'

Price: $9 | Buy it on Amazon
Speaking of Bill Murray, why not get the Scrooge a copy of "Scrooged" the hilarious retelling of Dickens' holiday classic starring Mr. Murray. While it's not your typical gag gift, it's sure to get a laugh when the grump of your choosing opens it.

Emergency Clown Nose
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

EMERGENCY CLOWN NOSE

Price: $9 (12 pack) | Buy it on Amazon
For those times when a laugh is urgently needed, these emergency clown noses are a quick and easy way to bring on the chuckles during the holidays -- or anytime. The squishy foam noses can be used for any occasion -- from boring office holiday parties to cheering up fellow drivers in bad traffic -- plus they come in a 12 pack so everyone can share in the fun.

Reindeer Antlers Headband
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

REINDEER ANTLERS HEADBAND

Price: $9.69 | Buy it on Amazon
Lead the way like Rudolph with this plush reindeer antler headband, the perfect gift for holiday parties, costume soirees, or just wearing around the house. They're just like the ones worn by one of our favorite Scrooges, Bill Murray, in "A Very Murray Christmas," so they're bound be a great fit for the Scrooge in your life.

A Christmas Carol Movie
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

'A CHRISTMAS CAROL'

Price: $7.21 | Buy it on Amazon
And if you're poking fun at the griper in your life with one movie about Scrooge, you should probably get them the classic film, "A Christmas Carol." They may just learn to be a little less grumpy this year, and maybe they'll avoid visits from the ghosts of Christmas.

Yodeling Christmas Pickle Ornament
Photo credit: Courtesy of walmart.com

YODELLING CHRISTMAS PICKLE ORNAMENT

Price: $11.47 | Buy it on Amazon
This ornament is the perfect gift for the Scrooge in your life who would rather be doing anything other than decorating a Christmas tree. Hanging a pickle on the tree is actually an old German tradition, and this one has the added annoying bonus of sounding off every time someone walks by its motion detector.

Emergency Underpants
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

EMERGENCY UNDERPANTS

Price: $6.96 | Buy it on Amazon
Even Scrooge deserves a chuckle on a crappy day, and these emergency underpants are sure to come to the rescue. An excellent stocking stuffer for the most crotchety among us, this is a great one for your grumpy grandpa or co-worker.

Bearded Ski Mask
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

BEARDED SKI MASK

Price: $32.58 | Buy it on Amazon
While it may be a bit of splurge, this bearded ski mask also serves a practical purpose by keeping your favorite malcontent's surly face warm. It's a great gag gift for the avid skier or snowboarder looking to escape the holidays or anyone who just wants to hide from family and friends this season.

Fake Spider in a Box
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

FAKE SPIDER IN A BOX

Price: $19.49 | Buy it on Amazon
For the arachnophobe in your life or the grouch who loves playing pranks, this spider is sure to bring plenty of shrieks and laughs when the unsuspecting recipient opens the box. Since it already comes in its own box, it makes for the perfect holiday gift, and some reviewers have suggested decorating the outside so it's even more of a surprise.

Reindeer Farts Cotton Candy
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

BAG OF REINDEER FARTS COTTON CANDY

Price: $9.95 | Buy it on Amazon
For anyone who has ever wondered exactly how Santa's reindeer fly, this gag gift should clear things up -- or at least clear the room. The Bag of Reindeer Farts is filled with peppermint cotton candy, so you'll not only cheer up the curmudgeon, but they'll have a snack to enjoy as well. Plus 10 percent of profits are donated to charities that provide toys to children in need, so everyone wins.

Nap Sack Sleep Hood
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

NAP SACK SLEEP HOOD IN A BOX

Price: $7.80 | Buy it on Amazon
The Scrooge in your life would mostly likely prefer to sleep through the holiday celebrations -- or really anything that involves fun -- so why not give them the perfect accessory to do so. Important note: This is just a gag gift box with the images on the outside, there's no sleep hood inside, but it's great for chuckles and you can put your actual gift inside.

Blah Button
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

BLAH BUTTON

Price: $11 | Buy it on Amazon
For those times when your cranky friend, family member, or co-worker gets tired of all the holiday cheer and caroling, they can just hit the Blah Button and it will say exactly what they're thinking: "Blah, blah, blah." The battery operated button says "blah" 12 different ways -- fast, slow, different voices -- because why mess with perfection?

Santa's Surprise Jelly Beans
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

SANTA'S SURPRISE JELLY BEANS

Price: $9.95 | Buy it on Amazon
A bit of Christmas potty humor is probably what your favorite sourpuss needs this holiday, and Santa's Surprise Jelly Beans delivers a big load of fun right down the old chimney chute. The red (strawberry), green (watermelon), and white (piña colada) jelly beans are great for a laugh and actually taste good. Might be a bit over-the-top for your boss, but hey, maybe they have a great sense of humor.

Whoopie Cushion
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

WHOOPEE CUSHION

Price: $19.90 (Set of 3) | Buy it on Amazon
A classic gag gift, the musical sounds of a Whoopee Cushion never fail to deliver laughs. Available as a set of three, this self-inflating version will let you have a gas by pranking the Scrooge in your life throughout the holidays -- and they may just start surprising others with it, too.

Snake in a Can
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

SNAKE-IN-A-CAN

Price: $10 | Buy it on Amazon
Another classic gag, the old snake-in-a-can trick is a great gift for any crab, and this one has the added fun twist of having the snake -- which measures 4 feet, 5 inches -- spring out of a potato chip can. Sure to surprise your Scrooge, and may even make them crack a smile -- even if they say "Bah, humbug" afterward.

Lump of Coal
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

LUMP OF COAL

Price: $5.95 | Buy it on Amazon
Chances are the Scrooge you know has been on Santa's naughty list this year, so give them a chuckle with this novelty lump of coal. Made of plastic, the lump of coal comes with a drawstring bag that says "You've Been Naughty" and a button that says "I'm on the naughty list" so they can wear their grumpiness proudly.

Drinking Helmet
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

DRINKING HELMET

Price: $11.29 | Buy it on Amazon
The curmudgeon in your life probably hates having to get up from their favorite chair during the holidays, so this helmet saves them the trouble by letting them drink two beers or sodas together without even having to lift a finger. They just put two cans in the holders and drink through the straw, and then they can enjoy watching "Scrooged" uninterrupted.

Gift of Nothing
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

GIFT OF NOTHING

Price: $9.51 | Buy it on Amazon
There's always at least one person on your holiday gift buying list who when you ask them what they want this year they say, "Nothing!" So instead of getting frustrated, get them what they want: Nothing! The Gift of Nothing comes wrapped in plastic with a little explanation about all the things that the recipient can do with nothing.

Canned Unicorn Meat
Photo credit: Courtesy of thinkgeek.com

UNICORN MEAT

Price: $13 | Buy it on Amazon
This gag is probably not for the animal lover in your life or young kids, but for the Scrooge who thinks nothing is sacred, it's perfect. The SPAM-looking can boasts of "magic in every bite" and that it's an "excellent source of sparkles" while inside the easy-open can, you'll find a stuffed plush unicorn toy that's chopped into pieces. Scrooge will love it.

Ben & Jerry's Ice Cream Pint Lock
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

BEN & JERRY'S EUPHORI-LOCK ICE CREAM PINT LOCK

Price: $35.95 | Buy it on Amazon
This Ben & Jerry's Ice Cream lock is ideal for the Scrooge who refuses to share their pint of Chunky Monkey Ice Cream. The easy-to-assemble two-piece lock has a three digit code to help keep their sweets secure. You may want to get yourself one of these, too.

Huge Wine Bottle Glass
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

HUGE WINE BOTTLE GLASS

Price: $18 | Buy it on Amazon
Scrooge was never big on generosity, so a wine glass that fits an entire bottle of wine seems like the ideal gag gift for the crab in your life that loves wine but hates sharing. And hopefully the huge wine bottle glass will help brighten their mood a bit during the holidays, but there are no guarantees on that.

WTF Notepad
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

WTF NOTEPAD

Price:$5.30 | Buy it on Amazon
This notepad is great for when the Scrooge in your life can't be bothered to complain directly to someone and would rather just leave a grouchy message. The WTF notepad offers plenty of prickly options such as "WTF were you thinking?" and "WTF is wrong with you?" and the notes can be applied to any situation they find annoying.

Leg Lamp
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

LEG LAMP

Price: $40 | Buy it on Amazon
A replica of the famous leg lamp from the holiday classic "A Christmas Story," this novelty gift is sure to brighten the spirits of any grouch just as it did the father in the movie. Just be sure not to "accidentally" knock it over and break it.

Moody Cards
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

MOODYCARDS

Price: $11.88 | Buy it on Amazon
A handy gag gift for your moodiest of friends or family members this flippable pad comes with plenty of curmudgeonly statements that your Scrooge can share with their co-workers. The pad also comes with blank cards and an erasable pen so they can write their own surly messages, as well.

Snowman Poop Earrings
Photo credit: Courtesy of etsy.com

SNOWMAN POOP EARRINGS

Price: $8 | Buy it on Etsy
Because there's a good chance you know a Scrooge that needs earrings, these snowman poop earrings are the perfect gag stocking stuffer. The card on the white glitter stud earrings says it all: "Heard you've been naughty, so here's the scoop ... all you get for Christmas is snowman poop." Very classy.

British Accent Breath Spray
Photo credit: Courtesy of offthewagonshop.com

BRITISH ACCENT BREATH SPRAY

Price: $6 | Buy it from Off The Wagon
If your gift recipient is really feeling like Scrooge this holiday season, why not give them this handy breath spray that promises an instant British accent just like old Ebenezer himself. It makes "Bah! Humbug!" sound particularly nasty. Charles Dickens would surely approve.

Grilled Cheesus Sandwich Press
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

THE GRILLED CHEESUS SANDWICH PRESS

Price: $40 | Buy it on Amazon
While everyone else is caroling and merrily celebrating the holidays, your Scrooge can keep themselves entertained by making grilled cheese sandwiches with this sandwich press that toasts an image of Jesus onto the bread. It's the type of irreverent and actually useful gag gift that any Scrooge would appreciate.

Fake Bug Sandwich Bags
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

FAKE BUG SANDWICH BAGS

Price: $7.67 | Buy it on Amazon
No one will ever steal your Scrooge's lunch from the refrigerator again with these gag sandwich bags that make it look like there's a bug crawling inside. Your crabby friend or family member will also likely get a sinister laugh when they see the shocked reactions on people's faces as they reach for the bags.

E.M.T. Lunch Tote
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

E.M.T. LUNCH TOTE

Price: $18.69 | Buy it on Amazon
This makes a great gift for that co-worker, friend, or family member who is sick of everyone asking them what they're having for lunch. The lunch tote is made to look like they're transporting human organs, a macabre joke that only a Scrooge would truly appreciate.

Shakespearean Insult Bandages
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

SHAKESPEAREAN INSULT BANDAGES

Price: $10 | Buy it on Amazon
When the Scrooge in your life wants to insult someone in a classy way -- and also happens to have a minor cut or scrape -- these Shakespearean Insult bandages are perfect. They can add insult to injury and be more creative than just, "Bah! Humbug!"

Shut The Hell Up Chewing Gum
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

SHUT THE HELL UP CHEWING GUM

Price: $1.79 | Buy it from Off The Wagon 
When the words aren't enough, your Scrooge can simply offer someone a nice big pack of Shut The Hell Up gum. Perfect for pesky carolers, noisy holiday revelers, and anyone trying to spread good cheer at the holidays.

Bacon Soap
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

BACON SOAP

Price: $7.35 | Buy it on Amazon
The malcontent in your life probably hates all of those flowery smelling soaps that people always gift during the holidays. So instead give them a bar of soap that smells like delicious bacon so they can scrub away all of that holiday cheer.

Coffee Flavored Candy Canes
Photo credit: Courtesy of amazon.com

COFFEE FLAVORED CANDY CANES

Price: $9.95 | Buy it on Amazon
Scrooge would likely scoff at the idea of a eating a traditional peppermint candy cane, but a coffee-flavored one is perfectly bitter for the old miser. This gag treat would also be great for the coffee lover in your life or anyone who might prank people by swapping these with peppermint ones.

Cheapism.com participates in affiliate marketing programs, which means we may earn a commission if you choose to purchase a product through a link on our site. This helps support our work and does not influence editorial content.