SunnyD Vodka Seltzer

Lacey Muszynski / Cheapism

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I want to know who greenlit SunnyD's new vodka seltzer, the company's foray into the liquor section. Did anyone at the company taste this stuff, let alone the execs? Is it just a scheme to make a quick buck off nostalgia-loving millennials and Gen Xers? 

The answer to that last one is for sure a yes, given the timing of its release right before summer holidays and parties. As for the other one, I'm sure someone at SunnyD tasted it, but I don't know what they were thinking because this drink is downright terrible.

First, let's talk about the color: It's freaking white! Why is it not the trademark SunnyD orange? I guess they're assuming that most people won't pour it into a glass anyway — this is low-brow, grab-out-of-the-cooler-behind-the-garage stuff after all — but it's jarring if you peer into the can to see that it's a cloudy white instead of the familiar, sunny color everyone expects (you know, in contrast to that "purple stuff" in the fridge from the old commercials).

SunnyD Vodka SeltzerPhoto credit: Lacey Muszynski / Cheapism

It also doesn't taste like SunnyD at all, at least not in the way you expect. Imagine leaving one of those distinctly shaped bottles of orange stuff outside on a picnic table in 90-degree weather for three days, then taking a swig. It would probably be sour, tart, and fermented, which is exactly how this tastes (minus the actual danger of drinking rotten juice, thankfully). 

There's entirely too much tang in the generic citrus flavor, and it somehow, magically tastes like it was made from a powder. You'll instinctively clean your front teeth after you take a sip to make sure there's no clumpy orange drink mix or Emergen-C stuck on. 

The only other flavor is that of the artificial sweetener SunnyD uses to try and make it palatable, stevia. It hangs around in your mouth way too long after you've swallowed as a reminder of all your life's terrible choices.

At $8 to $9 for a four-pack, you're better off sticking with your favorite hard seltzer or canned cocktail. And if you really want a Sunny Delight cocktail, just mix it with vodka (or gin!) yourself — at least it'll actually taste like SunnyD and vodka that way.

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