I Tried 10 Brands of American Cheese Singles, and These Were the Best (And Worst)

American cheese is a lot of things. It’s not technically “real” cheese the way others are, at least according to the FDA, which deems it a “pasteurized processed American cheese food.” While it is made from real cheeses like cheddar and Colby, it doesn’t contain the minimum threshold of 51% natural cheese to be considered real cheese. In addition to a variety of additives for color and shelf-stability, the magic ingredient in American cheese is sodium nitrate. This emulsifying salt allows American cheese to be pasteurized (heated to kill harmful bacteria) without falling apart.  

American cheese is also perfect for a variety of situations. It gets melty, yet doesn’t fully melt, making it the perfect sandwich or burger cheese. But you probably don’t need to be convinced if you're reading this. You’re a believer already. Want to know the best American cheese you can buy at a grocery store?  

I ranked 10 popular brands and found out.

Trader Joe’s has always had a strong cheese section. This is everything American cheese wants to be and more. It’s creamy, soft, slightly stretchy and chewy, just artificial enough, and still incredibly cheese-like. Toss this on a burger. Toss this on a tuna melt. A grilled cheese is obvious. Whatever your needs are for American cheese, they’ll be met with the Trader Joe’s version. 

Is there nothing the Publix deli can’t do? This is good stuff, almost Muenster-like. It tastes like cheese, like actual cheese, but unlike what Sargento has going on, this is a positive thing. Publix American cheese will make a mighty fine grilled cheese sandwich. 

I was expecting this when I tasted my first Kraft single. This is the American cheese that your memory thinks of. We’ve got good creaminess, we’ve got saltiness, only a slight funk, and a less yellow color that is a lot more pleasing on the eyes. I like this very much and would put this on any melt-based sandwich.

There is a surprising depth of flavor in Land O’Lakes, offering both the stickiness that makes American cheese great, but also easing up on the intensity of artificial cheese flavor. I’m not sure that American cheese is supposed to have the flavor complexity that this has, but it can only help elevate a burger to new heights. This is probably what I’d choose next time I’m making a smashburger. 

The truth is, so many of these cheeses taste identical. Borden and Harris Teeter are really similar, both lacking any distinct flavors that make them unique or special. Fifth place out of 10 is perfect for Borden though, because after this, the cheeses start to take a nose dive. Nothing’s inherently wrong with Borden, and that’s why it lives in the top half. 

As I mentioned, this is so close to Borden, but a lingering, bitter aftertaste doesn’t help the stickiness we’re already dealing with. I feel like I was never really done chewing the Harris Teeter cheese like there was always a little bit left in my mouth. I wouldn’t come back for this. 

Heritage Farms is doing a magic trick, or something. This tastes like nothing. I’m not being hyperbolic. Literally nothing. For a brief moment, I considered that I may have contracted Covid again, and that’s why I was unable to taste anything. Not the case, luckily.  

Celery has more flavor than this cheese. Water has more flavor than this cheese. What’s happening here? 

In my mind, Kraft was going to be Top 3. I thought, “There’s a reason Kraft is still around.”  

Kraft is the most artificial-tasting cheese by a mile. It’s thicker, stickier, and more cheese-flavored than anything else I tasted. You remember those pretzel-and-cheese snacks? With the cheese so thick that when you tried to dip your pretzel sticks in, they just broke and exploded into dust? Kraft tastes like that. Like a block of cheese dip that’s been flattened into a square patty. You can do far better than this. 

Sargento reminds you at the end of each commercial that they are “real cheese people” and that seems to be the case here. They’ve turned American cheese into something that much more resembles a “real cheese.” Unfortunately, this means they’ve added some flavors. And the real cheese people over at Sargento went way too far. I don’t like this flavor at all. If you want a boatload of flavors all at once, go for a real cheese. That’s not what American is for. 

I promise, I hate being the guy that always puts the vegan stuff last. I don’t mind vegan stuff, but when it comes to American cheese, maybe we should just… not. An artificial cheese product does not lend itself even a little bit to being made into a vegan food. 

Though this is technically sliced, good luck with that one. This is like one block of cheese with a few lines cut in it, and after a full five minutes of trying, I was unable to peel one clean slice. It was crumbling and tearing and sticking like mad. Touching this product is highly unpleasant. 

As for flavor, it’s not horrible at all. I don’t mind it, I guess. It’s nutty, like oat milk or something, but it’s just not American cheese. It tastes nothing like American cheese. There are some pretty decent vegan cheeses out there. Don’t settle for this one.