I Tried 6 Yellow Mustards, and One of Them Was a Trojan Horse

Mustard is the most diverse condiment, and we all know it. Because it's a vehicle for so many different flavors and styles, the most classic type of mustard — yellow mustard — can be forgotten. Around here, we appreciate all that yellow mustard does. There would be no backyard barbecue without it. 

Which brand wears the crown? Who makes the best yellow mustard? I put together a yellow mustard taste test and ventured to find out, like any sane person does. Here are the six I tried, ranked.

Prices and availability are subject to change.

$1.87 from Walmart

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Obvious? Yeah, it is. Cliché? Probably. French’s didn’t luck its way into the hearts of the entire country by accident. This is the gold — uh, yellow — standard of what yellow mustard needs to be. The tang is just right, making me instantly crave relish. The kiss of garlic is a guardian angel, balancing out the vinegar. The consistency couldn’t be better, shooting out in wavy little lines that are begging to be spread across a hot dog. 

I have nothing but the utmost respect for this product right here.

$4.19 from Amazon

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Sir Kensington's, makers of some of the only mayo I’ll consider touching, has put together the most robust flavor experience of any mustard on this list. There’s a lot of complexity, and I really like the spirit of what’s going on here. Flavors like clove and cinnamon are very welcome in my mustard. I am fully on board.

$7.90 from Amazon

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I can explain. It’s not much of a mystery. I grabbed this without fully reading the bottle. When I saw “chili dog,” I thought it meant “for a chili dog.” I fully missed the word “seasoned.”

This is yellow mustard with chili flavoring. That spiced, curry-ish flavor is mildly present here, and it’s a huge winner. Gone is the bright yellow color; instead, we’ve got something more like the color of a spicy brown mustard. It’s probably not fair to consider it for this list since everything else is just plain yellow mustard, but look, Plochman’s is innovating. None of the other brands have a chili variation. There are great minds over at Plochman’s.

$13.50 for a two-pack from Amazon

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This tastes the most like homemade mustard out of any of ‘em. If you want something for a hearty Italian sausage, this is a great call. If you’re just jamming on some Hebrew National hot dogs, look for a more classic yellow mustard.

Related: 26 Delicious Recipes That Use Up Those Aging Condiments in the Fridge

Available from Instacart

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You’ll never believe this, but here’s the truth: These all mostly taste the same. Mustard flavor is mustard flavor. Every last one of these contain the same base ingredients: distilled vinegar, salt, turmeric, paprika, black mustard seeds, and yellow mustard seeds. Shocking, I know.

The other thing I know is that when I tasted these, I said “mmmm” out loud for almost all of them. Woodstock didn’t make the cut for that one, and I think that’s quite telling. This brand is good, but when you can score a bottle of French’s for under two bucks, it's not worth the price.

Related: In-N-Out Sauce Versus Trader Joe's Magnifisauce Copycat

$1.76 from Walmart

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This is the most watery, bland mustard I tasted by far. Honestly, I’m a little steamed that it even exists. Stay in your freaking lane, Heinz. It’s not good enough that you’ve got a monopoly on ketchup? You’ve gotta come for mustard’s corner, too? You've got a lot of nerve. 

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