11 Types of People Who Shouldn't Set Foot in Costco
For some, Costco is a wonderland of giant jars of pickles, inexpensive handles of liquor, and pillow-size bundles of cheap socks. But while there are obvious benefits to shopping there, some people might be better off just saying "no" to Costco.
Have you heard? Costco sells coffins. Round the corner past flat-screen TVs, wander past the jewelry, look up from your phone, and boom: coffin samples. It can be more than just a little unsettling to anyone who is freaked out by death or gets claustrophobic just thinking about coffins or graves. To be fair, the displays feature only sections of coffins, but that's still not exactly cheery or comforting to the casual shopper who would rather avoid thoughts of inevitable death.
Costco can be very unpleasant for people who had a bit too much to drink and not enough sleep the night before. The huge warehouses have harsh, penetrating lights to illuminate every nook, cranny, jumbo jar of mustard, and quadruple box of cereal. Being surrounded by millions of items can be flat-out overwhelming to people who don't drink at all, but to someone who's still working those last couple glasses of pinot out of the system, the sheer visual noise of all the stuff and actual noise from chattering people can be too much of a headache.
One of Costco's many blessings is the samples provided regularly to shoppers. This can easily turn into a curse for people inclined to scoop up and buy whatever they taste. Depending on the time of day, a shopper could get lucky and score 10 or more samples -- great in theory, but not if it leads to a cart overflowing with miniature hot dogs, granola, soda, and crackers with cheese, along with a bill of a couple hundred bucks just for finger food.
People with low levels of patience also might feel like they're in purgatory at Costco. It's tough to avoid a lot of waiting and maneuvering around people and their massive carts while they pore over lists or await help reaching items high on the shelves. Then there's waiting in clogged lines to check out and leave the place -- and forget about grabbing a slice of pizza or a hot dog in the loud, crowded food area once the shopping is done.