Wilder Shaw / Cheapism
Is your current McDonald’s rotation starting to get a little stale? Bored of the same burger every time? There are a surprising amount of shapes and forms that McDonald’s burgers can take.
If you're sick of the chicken sandwiches and not here for the Filet-O-Fish, I'm here to help. I don’t have much McDonald’s allegiance, so I decided to grab one of every type of burger and try them with an open mind. Here are six McDonald’s burgers, ranked from best to worst.
$2.29
To call this a cheeseburger doesn’t really feel accurate to me. Sure, it’s a ground beef patty and cheese on a bun, but this is like something … else. And I love it.
It’s quite a testament to McDonald’s that I love it, as a matter of fact. I generally don't order burgers from fast-food restaurants unless that restaurant is called In-N-Out. Ketchup isn't my favorite thing either, and tomato is usually a required component in my mind.
This burger is loaded with ketchup, doesn't contains a single tomato, and defies what I love on all levels. And I still can't resist it. This sloppily-assembled mess of ingredients is a winner for me every time.
I should probably mention something important about these cheeseburgers, and the same goes for every other burger on this list. McDonald’s has a very specific window of time in which this food is best enjoyed. The minute your cheese starts to solidify again, you’re in trouble. Eat this guy immediately.
$3.39
I had never heard of this burger prior to today, nor was I aware that McDonald’s occasionally names their sandwiches after “Jeopardy” segments. The Daily Double consists of two patties, shredded lettuce, tomato, onion, and mayo. Surprise! I’m also a mayo-hater. Yet, here we are again, with something I’d generally avoid up at the top.
This burger really just hit in the best possible way. I would never expect mayo to be the sole condiment on a burger I enjoy, but the Daily Double has changed things for me. Not sure where I go from here. If I had any complaints, I’d skip the second patty and use the finely diced onions we see on other McDonald’s burgers, rather than these arbitrarily sliced sizes of the chain’s “slivered” onions.
$4.99
A Big Mac is fine at worst and good at best. I disagree conceptually with the idea of a middle bun, but that’s in all situations, even outside of McDonald’s (looking at you, club sandwich). The sesame seed bun is probably the strongest aspect of the famous burger, and to be honest, I’m not sure why McDonald’s serves sandwiches on anything else.
Mickey D’s has a decent grip on special sauce, too, and it’s a welcome sight every time I see it oozing out the sides of the bun. They’ve now released a Double Big Mac, and since this is a double cheeseburger in its traditional form, that’s four patties right there. Yikes, gang.
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$4.99
As the name implies, these patties are thicker than the ones you’ll get on McD’s tiny cheeseburgers. This is the closest thing to a normal, real-life burger that McDonald's has. We’re back with sesame seed buns, which is a treat to me — but at the end of the day, I just don’t like McDonald’s meat enough to want more of it than the tiniest of cheeseburgers provide.
$3.79
This is the classic cheeseburger, just with a second patty and some bacon. I’m a big fat snob and don’t care for most fast-food bacon, but this is especially underwhelming. The addition of a second patty and bacon really dry up the remaining moisture in this burger, of which there wasn’t much to begin with. You’re better off getting two cheeseburgers if you’re hungry.
$7.59
This isn’t that different from everything else on the list, but it’s such a beast that it probably warrants some mention. What we’ve got here is basically just a QPC with tomatoes, lettuce, and another patty. Again, you’ll need to eat this one quickly to enjoy it; if the last slice of cheese has stopped melting, you’re probably too late.
This thing is huge. You really need to love the quality of McDonald’s meat to get through it. Under eight bucks is a good price for something this big, but I can’t help imagine your local roadside greasy spoon has something better for the same price.