Wilder Shaw / Cheapism
Fish sticks are great. If you don’t think so, you’ve come to the wrong place. Fish sticks encapsulate the entire concept of fish and chips in one bite; even when frozen, a good fish stick can still hit.
But which frozen fish stick brand is best? Who should you be looking for at your local grocery store? I grabbed the only five brands I could find — Gorton’s and Mrs. Paul’s really seem to have a hold on the market — and ranked them based on taste. Here’s what my experiment revealed.
$5.99 from Whole Foods
Of all the fish sticks I tasted, these taste the most like they came out of an actual restaurant kitchen. Rather than the minced-and-then-combined hot dog treatment that many fish sticks get these days, a StarFish stick looks like an actual filet, with a whole piece that feels legitimately warm, soft, and steamy underneath the crunchy panko batter.
Excellent job to the fine folks at StarFish. It’s unlikely I’ll ever reach for another brand again, if I can help it.
Available from Instacart
I'll admit this first: The shape is probably my favorite thing about these guys. They’re thin and crispy like french fries, and the 12-minute bake time suggested by the box was spot on. These sticks have a gorgeous crunch and one of the best batters, but I can’t deny that they’re a little salty. If you’re dipping them into a creamy sauce you’ll probably be fine, but be warned. Maybe ranch dressing is best, this time around.
$5.49 in-store from Trader Joe's
Trader Joe’s is sort of a yin and yang of good and bad. Much like the StarFish sticks, these appear to be larger pieces of fish, leaving the texture inside nice and buttery. This major benefit is heavily combated by a super underwhelming seasoning. I appreciate the real fish, and this is overall pretty solid, but I wish the batter had some sort of flavor profile.
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$5.48 from Walmart
There is an uneasy greasiness that comes along with bar food. It's one that’s both comforting and a little nauseating, but it's precisely what Mrs. Paul's is like. I like that Mrs. Paul's are almost as thin as the Fremont fish sticks, but with every bite I felt like I was eating something from straight out of the fryer at a sports bar. If it's not 3 a.m., that's not what I want.
Related: Are Rao's Frozen Pizzas Any Good? I Tasted Them All To Find Out
$7.39 from Target
Gorton’s really isn’t bad. It isn’t really anything. It's got the least flavor of the sticks I tried, but at the end of the day, it’s still something that’s salty, crunchy, hot, and fried. That combo is hard to screw up, and Gorton’s will do just fine if you’ve got a fish stick craving and no other options. At the end of the day, no matter what brand of frozen fish stick you’ve chosen, you’re just gonna dunk it in tartar sauce anyways. Gorton’s won’t mind.
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